Engineers…

Great thread with some funny jokes and what not about engineers.

Just a sampling:

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things
mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he
happily retired.

Several years later the company contacted him
regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of
their multimillion dollar machines. They had tried everything and
everyone else to get the machine to work but to no avail. In
desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many
of their problems in the past.

The engineer reluctantly took the
challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. Finally, at the
end of the day, he marked a small “x” in chalk on a particular
component of the machine and said, “This is where your problem is.”

The
part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The company
received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They
demanded an itemized accounting of his charges.

The engineer responded briefly: One chalk mark $1; Knowing where to put it $49,999.

I also like this one:

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.